A couple of years ago, my brother and I began a tradition of watching all of the “Halloween” movies every October. In the midst of this tradition, I made a discovery. I really enjoy Jamie Lee Curtis. I also realized that my mom is a lot like Jamie Lee Curtis and the character she plays in the “Halloween” series that epitomized her acting career.
The first “Halloween” movie is set in Haddonfield, Illinois in 1978. Jamie Lee plays Laurie Strode, a high school senior. She sports a Midwestern accent and has the kind of hair that screams, “look at me! It’s 1978!” I can’t overlook her sweet, innocent nature when she takes the joint from her friend and then violently coughs after trying it. My mother’s name in 1978 was Lori Sanders. She was also a high school senior who looked like she was standing on the other side of Jamie Lee Curtis’ mirror. Although she grew up in California, she is often times mistaken for being a Wisconsin native and speaks with the same aforementioned accent. Same name, same voice, same hair, same age, same innocence that prohibits pot-smoking.
Soon after we began this tradition, I began to see commercials featuring Jamie Lee in which she was encouraging women to eat yogurt to help with their digestive systems. Whereas I do not need help with fiber after having my gallbladder removed, I was amazed at the amount of enthusiasm she showed while presenting the yogurt. Much like my mother, Jamie Lee gained a new look on life by using yogurt to her advantage and making her life more regular, in every sense of the word. I’m sure it is common for women to relish dairy products as they get older and their calcium and fiber levels require attention, but something about the twinkle in Jamie Lee’s eyes seemed too familiar. How is it that both Jamie Lee and my mother could share the same deep passion for creamy snacks and express this passion with the same gleam of hope and admiration in their eyes? I knew I had to dig deeper.
Upon investigation, I found that Jamie Lee is married to Christopher Guest, actor, filmmaker, and musician. Guest not only plays roles as a musician in some of his mocumentaries including “This is Spinal Tap,” but actually IS an acclaimed musician. Oddly enough, my mother is also married a professional musician. Around the time that “This is Spinal Tap” was released, it is no secret that my dad was playing instruments and walking around town in pants that were too tight along with a fantastic mullet, much like the character that Guest created for his mocumentary.
Jamie Lee likes yogurt, my mom loves yogurt. My mom looks like Jamie Lee Curtis, sounds like Jamie Lee Curtis, is the same age as Jamie Lee Curtis, shares a name with Jamie Lee Curtis in the role that shaped her career and life, has virtually the same husband as Jamie Lee Curtis, and in fact shares so many commonalities with Jamie Lee Curtis that I began to think that my mom IS Jamie Lee Curtis.
When I say that she is Jamie Lee Curtis, I do not mean that she is living a double life. When I say that these two separate individuals are in fact the same being, I must refer to the principle of metempsychosis. When the number of coincidences and commonalities between two people begins to take prevalence over the aspects of the person that deem them unique to themselves, the authenticity of their individuality must be addressed.
Metempsychosis explains this uncanny resemblance or collection of common factors by suggesting that upon a person’s death, their soul is transferred into another body. When a soul becomes available, it implants itself into another body, therefore reincarnating the original soul so that it can repeat the process of life, learning, and death. One obviously discernable argument against the occurrence of this phenomenon in this particular case is that neither Jamie Lee Curtis nor my mother are dead. In order for a true instance of transmigration to exist in this situation, there would have had to have been a death, followed by a period of free rest for the newly-available soul, followed by a rebirth. What I am suggesting lies within the general principles of metempsychosis, but allows for, and actually insists that both parties must exist and live within the same time period. This theory to which I am referring will hence be referred to as Simultaneous Energy Cohabitation.
If we examine Plato’s model of soul migration, we find that all souls go through a period of latency between body transmissions. Because no one knows what a soul is, or how it functions in relation to itself, there is no way to fully comprehend its structure during the period of latency. One assumes that while contained in the human body the soul acts as one bonded, cohesive unit. However, when a soul is independent from a body, there is no reason to assume that the soul automatically remains in this bound structure. If a soul is intangible and immeasurable, then it is not bound by rules of science that dictate that the matter must be conjoined or is comprised of atoms that are attracted to one another. I suggest that during this period of latency, the soul is able to spread out and is not forced to abide by physical rules that would keep the entity tightly knit to itself. It is in this spreading out that pieces of the soul may become permanently disconnected from the entirety of the entity and cause a modified soul migration to occur.
There is a traditional and expected outcome when considering conception and development of human beings, but as we see with birth defects, there are always exceptions to any expectations of normality. If the rule for transmigration predicts the outcome as one soul in one body, then this will be the outcome for a majority of the cases. However, there is chance for a mutation to occur during the period of soul transplantation. If the available soul were to experience a stimuli that would interact just enough with the soul to cause it to rift and split, then it would be reasonable to assume that the two pieces would now be made of the same matter, but would act as two separate beings. Once split, each half of the soul would still need to fulfill the process of metempsychosis, but would each do so on its own accord as now the two halves are no longer a whole. One half of the whole would inhabit one body, and the other half would be forced to inhabit a separate body. Each would still exhibit the same characteristics as they are comprised of the same history and makeup, but would carry on through separate veins, all the while lacking in what the severed other half has taken with it. This action would be comparable to a single embryo that spontaneously splits, but miraculously results in a set of twins comprised wholly of what began as one base unit. Whereas modern science shows that a split like this in an unborn child would ultimately end in miscarriage, a soul would not fall victim to these same physical restrictions as souls are not part of the physical world.
If a split soul were to move into two separate bodies during a modified transmigration, we would encounter Simultaneous Energy Cohabitation. That sense of a twin soul, soul mates, doppelgängers, and others may all be examples of what happens when one soul inhabits more than one body. I’m no scientist, but I suspect that this is what may have happened in the case of Jamie Lee and my mom.
Jamie Lee Curtis went on to become an actress, author, civil rights activist, and all around popular Hollywood starlet. My mom also went on to achieve many great things, the most important of these being giving birth to me. Genetics dictate that when a person reproduces, the offspring will carry some of the defining traits of each parent. Psychology dictates that there is a strong bond between offspring and parent and that young children often times experience difficulty in differentiating themselves from their mothers. Parents live vicariously through their children and children battle the necessity to make their parents proud. There is a physical and mental realm of individuality that is built on the notion that individuals are in fact a part of their parent. A person cannot exist without their parents, as a part cannot exist without the whole. An offspring is what its parent is, and this is an undeniable truth of reproduction. In development of identity and self as defined by heredity, I find myself a replica of sorts from those who created me. Because I am a part of my parents, I am more accurately a part of my mother as we are both female, and therefore must naturally be more alike. In essence, if I am my mother, and my mother is Jamie Lee Curtis, then by principle of the transitive property of equality, I am also Jamie Lee Curtis.
When this concrete realization struck me, I felt compelled to know more. As I began to find similarities between myself and Jamie Lee Curtis, I came to realize that perhaps I was wrong. I felt silly to have entertained the ludicrous notion that my mother could share a soul with Jamie Lee Curtis. As I continued to research, I understood that it had only been me who is Jamie Lee Curtis all along. The connections between Jamie Lee and my mother were mere stepping-stones to bring me to the truth.
There are the small things, of course, such as Jamie Lee writes children’s books and blogs for online newspapers. I have dipped my hands into the genre of children’s literature a time or two, though my works were never published and probably never will be. I also have a blog, with at least five followers.
Last Christmas my husband and I decided that we were going to go out of town for the holidays and spend Christmas and New Year’s on a road trip. After making the plans and telling everyone that we were going and fighting back against complaints and judgments, we ended up coming home on Christmas Eve and then went to extremes to pull off all of the Christmas mandates that we had neglected to do in our prior planning. Much as my mom’s life overlapped with the character Jamie Lee played in a holiday-themed film, my life overlaps with a character that Jamie Lee played in a more recent film, “Christmas With the Kranks.”
Although Curtis has many achievements to her name, she claims that her most important achievement is her sobriety. In interviews over the past few years, Jamie Lee admits that she is a recovering alcoholic who suffered from years of alcohol and prescription pill abuse. Although I have not recovered and am still a raging, violent alcoholic, we have this in common as well. Jamie Lee Curtis is older than I am though, so perhaps time will dictate that we eventually share the path of sobriety. I believe this will happen, because as noted previously, part of her soul is inside of me.
Despite our common interests, holiday behaviors, and depressing addictions, there is one final tie that binds us and convinces me that we are one in the same. Like myself, Jamie Lee has two children, which lead me to my next and most important connection. Whereas I made my children, Jamie Lee adopted hers, causing a bit of a tornado in the Hollywood gossip columns. When left to their own devices, we have seen that media sources will state that adoption points to only one thing; inability.
Jamie Lee is said to have a chromosomal disorder called Androgen Insensitivity Syndrome, or AIS, which basically means that she is genetically male, exhibiting XY chromosomes, but her body did not accept the androgens that would cause her body to form male genitalia. This theory insists that if genetically screened, Jamie Lee would be male on a piece of paper, but has a vagina, lacks a uterus, and therefore does not get a period. If it is true that Jamie Lee is so male that she does not menstruate, then we have a clear explanation for why no one has ever reported that Jamie Lee Curtis is a bitch.
Reasoning behind this accusation stems from a variety of observations that I can easily apply to myself. To begin with the most juvenile of the premises, individuals claim that her name is androgynous and was given to her because her parents were unable to tell whether or not she was female. Consequentially, this is in direct opposition with the initial rumored diagnosis of AIS, because as previously stated, Jamie Lee would have a vagina and would simply appear to be a male on paper or in a thorough medical examination. This name business suggests that she is intersex, or houses both forms of genitalia. However, I digress, this defense of her femininity is beside the point I am conveying.
My name is Ashley Jae. Ashley is most notably affiliated with the male lead in “Gone With the Wind.” Ashley was at one time, a strong masculine moniker and did not cross the gender-name barrier until the past century. This name is still used for males in some cases, but not as commonly as in the past. Jae is one of those middle names that does not specify much about gender, or much about anything relating to the keeper of the name, really. The only time I have seen this middle name in place is in an episode of “The Simpsons” when Homer J. Simpson goes in search of his middle name, as he only knows his middle initial. After a great deal of soul-searching, he discovers that his middle name is indeed, Jay. If the name Jamie Lee is in question as being androgynous, the name Ashley Jae is most certainly guilty of the same adjective.
The next level of reasoning in this claim is that Jamie Lee’s appearance and the way she presents herself seems masculine or androgynous. She is tall and she has short hair. She is physically fit and has a deeper voice that commands attention. If these are all attributes of a man, then I am absolutely guilty of this as well. Not only have I been mistaken for a man on the telephone numerous times, I have even been mistaken for my own father, which seems a little extreme to me, but if people take Jamie Lee’s voice as a sign that she must be a man, then the interpretation that I am my own father must be a sign that people think I am a man, therefore I am a man.
In regards to appearance, I can once again involve my mother for evaluation and comparison. Ever since I was a child, I have memories of my mother making jokes in which she would state that people must think she is a man or a transvestite because she is on the tallish-side, and for some other reasons, I am sure, but really I never fully understood her reasoning in this thought. Over the years, I have also began to wonder if people think I am male, which could be an inherited thought because my mom was always saying things like that about herself, or which could be a direct result of all of the times I have been openly mistaken for a man. For example, a notable experience in my life occurred one day when I made a purchase at Auto Zone. When checking out at the counter, I thought I recognized the cashier as a girl I went to high school with. When I asked if I knew her, she replied with a little eye roll and an uninterested smile and said “I don’t think so, sir.” Later, I looked in the mirror and I guess I could see how she would have thought I was a man hitting on her. She could have mistaken my pregnancy for a gigantic beer belly and could have also thought that my ponytail meant I was a successful film director from the 1990s. Either way, in alignment with Jamie Lee Curtis, this individual thought I was a man, would have identified me as a man, and called me sir, which means that to the person, I am a man.
The final nugget of reasoning behind the rumor is that some doctor somewhere said at one time or another that Jamie Lee suffers from this disorder. This I cannot compete with because a doctor never said this to me before. However, who knows what the doctor said about me right after I left the office. Ultimately, only Jamie Lee Curtis knows which sex she is and I am the only one who knows about myself. No matter the truth, I am at ease knowing that Jamie Lee Curtis is the man, and I am also the man.
The evidence presented reflects that the identity triangle lingering over Jamie Lee, my mother and me spans far beyond coincidence and it is undeniable that we are all existing on separate planes, in separate bodies with the same core essence. If anyone asks, I will proudly proclaim, "I am Jamie Lee Curtis, and Jamie Lee Curtis is me!"
Ashley and Cecilia work hard, play hard, write stuff, read stuff... because they don't know what else to do with their lives.
I- We should buy something superficial
II- Buy odd clothing
I- An Unusual Social Event
I- We should go somewhere with dangerous animals
I- Somewhere with strange food
When we get ten total votes, the item with the highest number of votes will be our next expedition.
(One vote per reader, per category).